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Posted Sep 3rd, 2015 (2:28 pm) by Matt Felten
Keith Richards
Keith Richards

According to the stoned Stone, hip-hop's biggest accomplishment was "to show there are so many tone-deaf people out there."

In an interview with Daily News reporter Jim Farber, Keith Richards, joint in hand, absolutely shredded the entire genre of hip-hop, defecated on the remains, then proceeded to light the pile on fire.

"Rap — so many words, so little said." He continued: "What rap did that was impressive was to show there are so many tone-deaf people out there. All they need is a drum beat and somebody yelling over it and they're happy. There’s an enormous market for people who can't tell one note from another."

Jesus. Ok. We'll hold our comments for now.

Brace yourself, here's more: "Hip-hop leaves me cold. But there are some people out there who think it's the meaning of life... I don't wanna be yelled at; I wanna be sung to. I never really understood why somebody would want to have some gangster from L.A. poking his fingers in your face. As I say, it don't grab me. I mean, the rhythms are boring; they're all done on computers."

Keith. We all know that everyone has their own tastes in music, and it's true that there is a lot of crap hip-hop flying around. But you cannot generalize and discount an entire genre with a storied history and immensely soulful roots because you heard a few Migos tracks.

Hip-hop was not the only genre attacked, Richards also took a blast at heavy metal: "Millions are in love with Metallica and Black Sabbath. I just thought they were great jokes." As for rock and roll: "It sounds like a dull thud to me," Richards said. "For most bands, getting the syncopation is beyond them. It’s endless thudding away, with no bounce, no lift, no syncopation."

Well, there you have it. According to the god of all that is musical, your music sucks.

Now make sure you buy his solo LP Crosseyed Heart on Septemeber 18.

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